Signs Your Ex Will Never Come Back: Understanding the Final Goodbye

signs your ex will never come back

Table of Content

The pain of a breakup is hard to comprehend. It’s like ripping off a band-aid. After that, you are expected to move on, but moving on is the biggest challenge of all time. There are so many emotions involved that it can almost feel like the end of the world. After the breakup, you would definitely still have feelings for your ex and would want your ex back. But you need to know that it is one thing to hope for a reconciliation from your ex, but it is another to come to the realization that they will never return to you.

If you are one who has high hopes or even the tiniest sense of hope that you still have a chance and your ex will come back to you, it might be time for a wake-up call. It’s time to open your eyes to some of the sure signs your ex will never come back, and it may be time for the final goodbye.

Yes, it is hurtful to let go, but it is what it is. They have moved on, and you have to also. You know you have to; you have that gut feeling that you will never get back together, but moving on is so hard. You wonder how you can do that. You start by getting closure. Not just from your ex but from yourself.

It can be hard to do, but you have to try. You need to know that being oblivious, deliberately or not, will do you more harm than good. This is why it is better to cut short that sweet fantasy and face reality. Recognize the signs he will never come back and that it’s time to get closure and move on.

This article will show you the definitive signs your ex is done and has moved on, how to cope, and how you can move on.

Section 1: The Psychology Behind Breakups

There are so many reasons why many relationships have ended permanently. It is not because efforts were not made to make it work or reconcile, but there are some things that cannot be fixed once it is broken.

According to psychologist experts, there are so many reasons behind the permanent end of a relationship. Some of these include

1. Not Aligned Expectations and Needs

This is one of the common reasons why relationships come to a permanent end. When the values, dreams, and expectations of you and your partner don’t align, then it can lead to tension and conflict. No matter how much you love each other, having mismatched or unaligned expectations can lead to the permanent end of the relationship.

2. Lack of Communication

Communication is one of the pillars of any relationship. Without it, the relationship will crumble. It will be boring. There will be many misunderstandings, unresolved conflicts, and emotional distance that will take a toll on both of you. It might lead to hate, and over time, the relationship will fall apart.

3. Loss of Connection and Intimacy:

Relationships thrive on intimacy and connection, and when that is gone, the feeling of emotional distance and disconnection slides in, eroding the bond between them. It is one of the reasons many couples go to couples therapy. Note: It’s not that they don’t love each other anymore; it’s just that the intimacy and connection between them have faded and, when unaddressed, can lead to the end of the relationship.

Some factors that lead to loss of connection and intimacy include busy schedules, external stressors, or unresolved conflicts.

4. Trust

Trust is one of the pillars that keeps a relationship standing strong. When it is broken, rebuilding it can be one of the toughest tasks. The pain and betrayal that come with loss of trust is enough to end a relationship permanently, no matter the love felt.

5. Hurtful Things Would Have Been Said

Words have the power to cause a relationship to end permanently. There are some words that cannot be brushed under the carpet with an apology. In cases like this, the person on the receiving end would not want to reconcile because of the immense hurt they feel. This is why it is advised to watch what you say, especially during an argument, because just as words have the power to mend, so do they have the power to break.

Section 2: Definitive Signs Your Ex is Moving On

The signs your ex is moving on are there, right in front of you. Some are subtle, some are a little bit obvious, and some are very glaring. However, the question is, “Do you want to see them, or do you just not want to acknowledge that it is a sign because you are holding on to the hope that your ex will eventually come back?”

There is nothing wrong in hoping you get back with your ex, but you have to be sure your ex is on the same page. You might be in denial, but it is time to open your eyes and see the definitive signs your ex doesn’t want to come back.

You might think your ex’s actions or behavior towards you is normal and that your ex would return to you after a while. Know this: It shouldn’t be so. Don’t mistake the signs or how your ex acts towards you as them being stubborn and playing hard to get. You need to know that these signs mean that it is too late and your ex is truly never coming back.

Open your eyes and read between the lines. Here are definitive signs your ex has moved on

Direct Communication of Closure

Hearing “It is over” or “You have to move on from me” from your ex’s mouth is heart-wrenching. It’s like your heart has been stabbed with a wooden stake or a sharp knife. But it is what it is.

To them, it is a form of closure, but for you, it is one of the worst things you will hear, especially if they told you to move on when you have been wishing and hoping you both will reconcile and stay together.

Here are some statements your ex might say to you

· “It’s time to let me go.”

· “You need to move on because I have.”

· “It’s never going to work out between us again.”

· “I don’t want to have anything to do with you anymore.”

These statements are your ex’s direct communication of closure to you. Once any of these statements have been said, know your ex is gone forever, or the likelihood of your them coming back is very slim.

Complete Radio Silence

When your ex goes radio silent on you, this is one of the signs your ex will not come back to you. Being “radio silenced” by your ex means they’ve cut off all forms of communication. You will not be able to reach your ex or feel their presence directly or indirectly.

There are two ways you can get radio silenced – abruptly and slowly.

Being radio silenced abruptly is highly common. Immediately after the breakup, your ex cuts all forms of contact without prior warning or explanation. They might change their number and block your calls and messages, and also block or unfollow you on their social media platforms. This is a way to show that your ex doesn’t want to be in any form of contact with you.

On the other hand, slow radio silence means your ex gradually withdraws from all forms of communication with you. It can be confusing at first because one minute you both are talking frequently, the next, your communication rate is reduced, and then next, no more communication. All attempts to reach out via text and call end up with you getting no response. This means your ex has slowly ended all forms of communication between you.

Social Media Separation

Aside from the physical and emotional connection that ties you to your ex, social media is also involved. You and your ex have so many memories on social media, and in a bid to break that tie, your ex will separate from you on social media. This includes blocking or unfollowing you on all their social media platforms (Facebook. Instagram, X platform. WhatsApp, and more), deleting all public pictures of you in them, and updating their social media profiles or statuses.

You need to know one thing, especially if you are in denial: Blocking and unfollowing is not just about ignoring your messages; it’s not wanting to see your status; it’s not just a simple click of a button. It is a clear and intentional action.

By blocking and unfollowing you, they are sending you a loud and clear message – they don’t want to keep in touch with you, and they are completely done with you. This is a digital goodbye.

They Return Your Belongings

Returning of belonging after a breakup is not only seen in movies; it happens in real life. If your ex should return your belongings, this is a clear-as-the-sky sign that your ex coming back is not going to happen.

Sending back your gifts, clothes, possessions, and even your toothbrush shows they are getting rid of anything that serves as a reminder of the relationship.

Public Display of a New Relationship

This is one of the unmistakable signs your ex won’t come back to you. Knowing your ex is dating someone else is hard, but seeing them publicly display their new relationship is one of the toughest and hardest things to accept. However, it should be a wake-up call for you that they are no longer yours or the chances of your ex to come back is very low.

It doesn’t matter if you think or believe the relationship is a rebound one; what’s done is done. They are clearly showing you that they have moved on to someone else, and if you’re still carrying a torch for them, it’s time to put it out. Because you’re probably not going to see your ex return.

Shift in Social Circles

You and your ex have mutual friends you hang out with, so when you hear or notice your ex is avoiding your mutual friends, it means they are staying away from people who would remind them of you. The same goes for events.

Change in Behavior and Attitude towards You

Your ex might not tell you with words that it is over or that he or she doesn’t want to get back together with you; instead, they will let their behavior and attitude do the talking.

Once your ex changes their attitude or behavior towards you, from warmth or at least being civil to indifference or avoidance, it is a strong message they are deliberately passing across. They want you to read between the lines to see that you are no longer welcome in their life.

Lack of Interest in Your Life

If your ex shows little to no interest in knowing about you, this means they have mentally and emotionally moved on.

If your ex wanted to get back together with you, they would be curious about you. They would want to know if you are dating someone, how you are doing, etc. However, if they don’t mention you to other people, keep referencing you, asking how you’ve been, or show a keen disinterest or signs of jealousy when it comes to you and your romantic engagements, then this is a clear sign your ex is never coming back.

Whether you’re hanging out with someone, dating someone, or getting into a serious relationship, it doesn’t matter to them. The more indifferent your ex seems, the likelier it is that they won’t return.

Making Major Life Decisions Without You

When your ex starts making major life decisions without you, they’ve moved on. This could be moving away, pursuing a new career, or getting married. The last one, getting married, should be one of the biggest signs they have moved on without you.

Section 3: Coping with the Reality

Having to cope with the reality that your ex is never coming back to you is tough. One common question in this section is, “How do I go in from here?” “How do I cope with knowing my ex doesn’t want to get back together with me?”

Here’s the thing: You can. You just don’t know how. Here are some essential strategies to help you cope with the reality you find yourself in.

1. Accept

Coping with this reality starts with you. As a result, the first way to do that is to accept it. You’ll never move on if you don’t accept that the relationship has ended. Yes, it can be incredibly hard, but it is one foot in the door of your healing process.

2. Acknowledge What You Feel

Allow yourself to grieve and let out every emotion that you have been bottling up inside after the breakup and knowing that your ex is not coming back. If it’s sadness, anger, confusion, or relief, allow yourself to fully experience them.

Here’s a saying: “Life is a journey, and while on the move, keep letting off every emotional baggage on the side of the road. If not, the load will keep getting heavier, and you will get tired till moving forward will be difficult.”

Acknowledging and accepting what you feel is the first best strategy you can give yourself towards coping with this. Cry it all out until there are no tears left to cry over the pain.

3. Do Not Allow Negative Thoughts

Knowing that your ex isn’t coming back to you can often trigger negative self-talk and thinking patterns. Don’t allow yourself to be subjected to these thoughts. Replace self-critical thoughts with affirmations and reminders of your worth and resilience.

4. Seek Closure

One thing you need to know is that getting closure doesn’t only come with you sitting down with your ex to talk things over. You can get closure within yourself. The things you would do with your ex to get closure, do it to yourself. Talk to yourself and express your thoughts and feelings. You could write a letter to yourself pouring out all the things you would like to say.

5. Take a Break

You are allowed to do this. Give yourself a break. Go on trips alone or with your friends. Give yourself time to heal and bounce back. Take a break until you can close your eyes and boldly say within yourself that you are okay.

6. The Final Move

The ball is now in your court. It is time to move on because if you don’t, you will miss out on bigger and better things. Your ex never let the breakup stop them from moving on, so why should you? Instead of dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, focus on the present moment.

Note: In all these, you need to prioritize your self-care. It is the most important of them all.

  • Make sure you get enough sleep
  • Eat healthy
  • Exercise and spend more time with yourself, discovering new things about yourself.
  • Do the things you enjoy
  • Spend time with family and friends.

By doing these, you are taking care of your physical and mental well-being. To quote Nicolas Sparks: “It happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. So you keep the wonderful memories but find yourself moving on.

Section 4: Moving Forward Without Your Ex

If your ex has moved on, why should you be the one to remain in that position? You need to know that your life does not revolve around your ex, and that your ex never coming back doesn’t mean the end of the road for you. You are the one holding the reins of your life. You are in control. It is time to get back up and rebuild your life after the breakup and find your own happiness without your ex.

Just like it is done in the movies, for ladies, after a breakup and they want to heal, they do three things, which is like a three-point plan that has been proven to work.

Have a New Hair Style

Post-breakup hairstyles are always cathartic and invigorating. Getting a new hairstyle or hair color shows you are ready for a change. You walk out of the salon, a new you with a new look. Do you know what you have done? You have let go of the toxicity and emotional stress.


Many hit the gym post-breakup, and no, it’s not to lose weight but to stay fit. Also, it’s widely known that people who workout or exercise think more clearly and are more productive. You need a healthy dose of that right now.

New Clothes or Accessories

Treat yourself to something nice. Spoil yourself a little. It doesn’t have to be extravagant. It can be little or what your budget allows. Shopping is one of the things that makes one smile and feel so good. This is something to try on your journey to move on.

These tips have not failed many ladies who want to bounce back, and you can give it a shot. Some other tips to try out to rebuild your life post-breakup include

Give yourself time to heal

It is a gradual process, so be patient and gentle with yourself. Allow yourself to grieve the end of the relationship. Remember: Healing takes time, so don’t rush the process.

Focus on self-care

Love yourself. Focus on yourself. Put yourself first and prioritize self-care activities. These could be healthy eating, traveling, following your passion, or pursuing new hobbies. Engage in things that will bring you smiles, laughter, and relaxation.

Set goals for yourself

It doesn’t matter whether they’re related to your career, personal development, or relationships; just take charge of your life and set goals for yourself. Note: They should be achievable and realistic goals. This gives you a clear sense of purpose and redirection.

Explore New Interests and Relationships

Now that you have the tips to rebuild your life post-breakup, it is time to explore new interests and relationships. Yes, you have been hurt, but you should not give up on love because it hasn’t given up on you.

It might be scary, but it’s time you are open to stepping out of your comfort zone (gradually) and trying out new things. Keep an open heart and mind, and be willing to explore new romantic connections when the time feels right.

When you are ready to enter the dating world, take things slow. Don’t rush just to fill the void your ex left. Instead, focus on building meaningful connections based on mutual respect, compatibility, and shared values.

Section 5: When to Seek Professional Help

Sometimes, nothing seems to help you move on from your ex. You suddenly start feeling down and triggered by things that concern your ex. Deep down, you know you want to move on, but it’s proven difficult. This is because you are constantly feeling these:

· Persistent sadness or hopelessness

· Difficulty coping with daily activities

· Emotional anxiety

· Struggle to cope with basic daily activities such as getting out of bed, going to work, or taking care of yourself.

· Isolation and withdrawal

· Intense feelings of guilt or shame

These feelings lead to depression. In many cases, you turn to using alcohol, drugs, or other substances as a way to cope with the emotional pain you are feeling. It is understandable, and it is not your fault. You just find it difficult to move on.

Well, it’s time to get professional help through therapy. Therapy offers a non-judgemental environment where you can let go of all your emotions without any hard feelings, being criticized or rejected. It is also confidential.

A skilled therapist will help you deal with the emotions in a way that will not overwhelm you and will provide you with the support, validation, and empathy you need to move on and get back up.

Through therapy, you would be able to manage difficult emotions, such as sadness, anger, and anxiety, and embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth. At the end of it all, you will come out a renewed and revived person.


Recognizing these signs is highly important to you, your well-being, and your future. You need to know that not everything is amendable or can return to how it was. If it’s over, it’s over. That means it was not meant to be.

You have to look after yourself. Open your eyes to the signs so you can get closure and move on to personal development in preparation for something better. You need to know that what’s gone is gone, and you can only look forward, not backward. Something better awaits you on the horizon. Will you stay fixed on one spot, ignoring the signs that your ex has moved on? Or will you take the step to find closure and build yourself to receive a new and amazing love?

Additional Resources:

  1. Signs your ex is in a rebound relationship? It’s like watching a play unfold, unsure if the script is genuine or merely a facade.
  2. Why is my ex hot and cold? It’s like trying to navigate through a dense fog, where clarity seems just out of reach amidst their fluctuating behavior.
  3. Will my ex come back to me? It’s like waiting for a distant echo, hoping for a response but uncertain if it will ever reach your ears.
  4. Signs your ex is testing you? It’s like deciphering a cryptic message, trying to understand their intentions amidst the uncertainty.
  5. Why is my ex keeping tabs on me? It’s like being under a constant spotlight, with every move scrutinized, yet the reasons remain elusive.
  6. Is my ex giving mixed signals? It’s akin to walking on shifting sands, never quite sure of the ground beneath your feet as you try to decipher their true intentions.
  7. Signs your ex just wants to sleep with you? It’s like navigating a minefield of desires, where every step forward carries the risk of emotional explosion.
  8. Discovering your ex dating someone totally opposite of me? It’s like seeing a reflection distorted in a funhouse mirror, where familiarity is twisted into something unrecognizable.
  9. Does my ex miss me? It’s like listening for a whisper in a crowded room, straining to catch a glimpse of longing amidst the noise of life’s distractions.
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About Alex

Alex Bert is an esteemed relationship coach with a specialization in marital counseling. With over 14 years of experience, Alex and his team have developed multi-lingual online programs that have positively impacted over 180,000 individuals globally. His approach, known for its effectiveness and often counterintuitive advice, is grounded in extensive real-world experience rather than theory. 

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